Conversion Therapy Trauma: Real Stories of Psychological Harm
Real survivor accounts reveal the psychological impact of conversion therapy, including shame, PTSD, and long-term relational trauma.
What Conversion Therapy Does to the Mind
A brief note and advisory before reading: This article contains firsthand accounts of conversion therapy, including descriptions of psychological harm, trauma, and suicidality. Please be careful and remember that you have a choice to read content like this. Saying no is a powerful act of self-love and self-care. It's important to know about the harm in the world but its more important to protect our hearts so we can show up for ourselves, friends, communities and families....
In the wake of recent legal shifts around conversion therapy—particularly around how therapy is understood as protected speech—it’s important to move beyond abstract debate and listen directly to the people who have lived through it.
The legal landscape may be shifting—but the clinical and lived reality of harm has not.
The following accounts are drawn from publicly shared survivor stories. I’m including direct quotes, with sources, so you can read them in full and in context.
“I began to believe I was unlovable”
In a collection of survivor accounts published by Stonewall, one individual describes the psychological and spiritual impact of being subjected to conversion practices:
“My pastor, along with his wife and a counsellor, did all they could to convince me that it was wrong to be trans. Even though I’m unsure what I believe anymore, I still live with the fear that I will go to hell.
One of the most destructive impacts was that I began to believe I was unlovable. After all, if I was being told that even God couldn't bear who I am, then it was, and sometimes still is, difficult to see how I am worthy of love.”
Clinical perspective
This becomes about prioritizing a belief system over dignity.
When someone is told—explicitly or implicitly—that they are unacceptable not only to others, but to something as absolute as God, the impact often reaches beyond cognition.
It becomes relational and existential.
What develops goes beyond simple distress and can morph into a deeply rooted conviction:
“I am unlovable”
“I am fundamentally wrong”
That kind of internalization does not resolve easily. It often shows up later as:
difficulty receiving care
chronic shame
fear of intimacy
Not because the person lacks capacity for connection—but because connection has been paired with rejection.
“Today I struggle with trauma, PTSD…”
Another survivor, Eli—a gay man in his 20s—describes the long-term psychological effects of conversion therapy:
“Today I struggle with trauma, PTSD, and an eating disorder which are all linked to my conversion therapy experiences.
I have a difficult time with relationships, and intimacy scares me. A lot of people can’t comprehend what it’s like to have experiences like mine, even LGBT people. My parents still don’t understand why I didn’t want to have conversion therapy, or why it was so damaging. They think all therapy is a good thing.”
Clinical perspective
What Eli names here is something clinicians see repeatedly: the impact doesn’t end when the intervention stops.
It continues in the form of:
trauma symptoms
difficulty with intimacy
confusion around trust and care
There’s also something particularly important in what he says about his parents:
“They think all therapy is a good thing.”
This points to a form of institutional betrayal.
When harm occurs within something labeled as “therapy,” it can disrupt a person’s ability to trust not just others—but the very idea of help.
This unique kind of psychological and institutionalized harm creates a harsh and condemning inner-world for the people who survived this type of abuse.
What these stories make clear
These accounts are different people, different contexts, different lives.
But the psychological outcomes are strikingly similar:
shame
fear of one’s internal experience
disrupted attachment and intimacy
long-term trauma
This is what people are referring to when they talk about harm—independent of how these practices may be framed or debated legally.
This goes beyond the realm of abstraction and into real lived experience.
Final note
These stories are shared publicly by survivors with intention—often so others don’t feel alone, and so these experiences are understood more clearly.
Listening to these accounts matters—especially at a time when the boundaries between what is legal, what is called therapy, and what is experienced as harm are becoming less clearly aligned.
The least we can do is take them seriously.
If you’re trying to understand how these legal changes intersect with clinical practice, you can read more here:
https://erikkarffpsychotherapy.com/supreme-court-ruling-on-conversion-therapy-what-it-means-for-lgbtqia-clients-and-clinicians
